I don't get it, so I'll just wing it.

It's one of life's little mysteries that defies and mystifies, leaves me stymied and stupefied. I simply cannot fathom it. God knows I've tried. Every year Dan patiently tries to explain how it works, but I just. don't. get. it. I finally came to terms with the knowledge that I will probably never understand. I accept that.

Honest.

So, when Sunday's Superbowl is on TV, I'll be watching it with my family. I'll try to cheer at the appropriate times (BTW, who's playing?) and no doubt do a lousy job of feigning an interest. After all, it's pretty hard to follow the game when you're engrossed in the book you've brought to read between commercials.

I do love the commercials! In fact, my favorite Superbowl commercial of all time was during halftime several years ago. There was a grizzled old-timer sitting out on the porch in front of his shack, way down in the deep, dark backwaters of the Bayou. He had just added a drop of Tabasco Sauce to his bowl of chili and was about to take a bite when he noticed a mosquito had landed on his arm. He kinda grinned at the pest, took a bite of his chili, and a moment later the tiny blood sucker exploded like a little Hiroshima bomb. OMG— too funny! I'll never forget it.

Halftime is definitely a keeper. The entertainment, wardrobe malfunctions aside, is always spectacular.

However, my favorite Superbowl tradition is the snacks! In fact, Dan and I are running down to Petoskey tonight to shop. Our first stop will be the GFS store—Superbowl Party Central. Of course we'll have homemade guacamole and salsa. There will be subs and plenty of chips and maybe even a slow-cooker of Swedish meatballs.

But would any Superbowl party be complete without Buffalo wings? I mean, they're a "must", right? So you can imagine our panic when Dan heard the news last weekend that there was such a huge demand for chicken wings that inventories had virtually disappeared.

I could have cried. Seriously. I blamed all the pizza shops. I blamed Buffalo Wild Wings. I blamed all the places that have added wings to their menus, making it virtually impossible for the little guy to buy wings for his Superbowl party. I blamed the entire city of Buffalo, NY, for god's sake!

And I was angry... angry at all the scientists busy wasting their time cloning Labrador Retriever puppies and poking at a gelatinous mass of jellyfish to discover the fountain of youth... WHEN THEY SHOULD REALLY BE TRYING TO INVENT A CHICKEN WITH MORE WINGS!

Then imagine my relief when I read the news this morning that the whole chicken wings catastrophe is just another urban legend, a myth, a big, fat lie!

There are plenty of wings for everyone! Yea! The Superbowl is saved!

[ahem!] Even if you only plan to read a good book between commercials.

— Gee Vee

I Got Nuthin'

Well, I considered writing about the immortal jellyfish; they're pretty interesting given the fact that after reproducing they can revert to their adolescent phase and repeat the process over and over. Neat trick. But the thought of living forever just seems to bring up a whole host of issues I'm too sleepy to analyze this morning.

Then I thought about tackling Campbell Brown's commentary that takes Obama to task for breaking his own rules, hiring lobbyists to fill key positions in his administration... but I just don't feel up to controversy.

So I typed a few lines about the RAF's orders to shoot down UFOs over Britain, but that sounded like too much hype; I punched the delete key. I was even desperate enough to consider writing about the death of analog TV; the report out of England that claims that if you name your cow "Bessie" and show her a little love, she'll produce more milk for you; the stimulus bill that passed in the house; the ice storm wreaking havoc throughout the south-central states....

You know, I think I have a case of writer's block, pure and simple. Ironically, I just heard about a famous writer (maybe it was a question on Cash Cab?) who took off all his clothes whenever he had this problem. Apparently, it worked for him.

So, hey, why not...?

.....

.....

.....

Well, crud.

I still got nothin'. But I did manage to send the kitties and the dog tearin' upstairs like they'd just been scalded. Finally— I have the chair to myself!

All and all, not a bad way to start my day.

— Gee Vee

Make It So

While I sipped on a cup of Earl Grey tea last night, I wondered— not for the first time— about the qualities I most admired about the character of Jean-Luc Picard. Now, from a distance of many years, I can (at last!) confess that I fell hard for that guy. I was probably in my early to mid-thirties at the time and pining for a bald, mild-aged man— who didn't actually exist. Incredible.

To be honest, the first time I turned on the show, struggling to figure out who was whom, I was knocked for a loop.

You mean to tell me the tall, dark, handsome figure of Will Riker is only the first-mate— not the captain? That OLD MAN is the captain? What the...?!

However, by the end of that first episode, I was not only convinced, I was smitten. He had it all!

He was a deeply moral, highly logical, cerebral man with the wisdom of Solomon. Most notable, he didn't handle women with the casual, sexist inclinations of his Enterprise predecessor, Kirk. Although he welcomed and invited input in the decision-making processes, he, ultimately, took the responsibility for those decisions squarely upon his own shoulders. He could be a daunting adversary or a staunch ally. He could be fierce and utterly ruthless. He could be passionate and infinitely compassionate.

He was a leader of men for the ages.

And when he addressed the replicator, ordering a cup of tea with the beautiful, classical precision of his British accent... "Earl Grey, hot,"....

OH. MY. GOD. He was SEXY!

— Gee Vee

Birds of a Feather

Okay, before you watch this next video, I just want to let you in on a little secret— the whole "early bird gets the worm" myth is just a very clever strategy utilized by robins everywhere to distract and misinform the competition. Take it from me... anytime after a romantic sunset. [wink! wink!]

Oh, and the wisecracks about the "red breast"? Whisker burns.

Eat your heart out, ladies.

— Gee Vee

PS: By mid-winter, the berries mentioned in this video are fermented right inside the skin. Yup, you guessed it— the robins are clearly blasted and lovin' the party on Cape Cod!

"Recession Flu"

It's an overall malaise, a kind of lethargy that leaves us confined to our recliners, nursing a mysterious host of ills. Now that there's actually a name for our condition, we don't necessarily feel any better, but there's some comfort in knowing that at least it isn't all in our head. The Telegraph reports on new medical research into "Recession Flu."

Can't sleep? Can't seem to wake up? Can't eat? Eat too much? Drink too much? The list of complaints are apparently many and varied. It's a "spectrum disorder that covers all the symptoms brought on by living and working through the early days of a global economic downturn."

Living day in/day out with the grim reality confronting and bombarding our psyche at every turn is having a serious impact on our overall health. It's affecting our blood pressure and our day-to-day well-being. I've certainly noticed the influence the Recession Flu has had in my own life.

You know, once upon a time, I used to write a very funny blog. The original "Aunt Robin's Story Hour" was filled with amusing annecdotes that captured all the humorous situations that two empty-nesters encountered while trying to fill their days and their lives after "Jamie." If you've read me long enough, I'm sure you, too, have noticed the transformation you can read between the lines.

Last year took a huge emotional toll, and I'm still struggling to overcome the somber days and months surrounding my father's death. The economy and its impact on Northern Michigan certainly hasn't helped improve my outlook on life. However, I'll count myself fortunate if the only obvious manifestation has been in the tone and content of my writing. I recently put Aunt Robin's Story Hour on hiatus because I just couldn't seem to find any humor in my life to draw on for inspiration. However, I know "Aunt Robin" will be back some day. I'm an optimist by default, and living on the dark side is not my natural inclination.

I know I'll be able to make you smile again... just as soon as I'm able to shake off this nasty...[Aaaachooooooo!] bug. [snif!]

— Gee Vee

War Games

It was with mixed emotions that I read the news reports featuring an Army recruiter's office in Philadelphia. What makes this office newsworthy is the fact that it's tucked neatly between Banana Republic and Victoria's Secret stores in a busy mall. Through the glass storefront, potential recruits are tempted by an arcade-style gamer's paradise.

(photo credit: CBS News)

The U.S. Army Experience Center at Franklin Mills Mall has 60 personal computers loaded with military video games, 19 Xbox 360 video game controllers and a series of interactive screens describing military bases and career options in great detail.

(Photo Credit: CNN News)

While I have to congratulate the mastermind behind this recruiting strategy, I can't help but worry that this format, ultimately, glorifies war. BTW, I'm not speaking as a bleeding-heart liberal, I'm speaking from experience, having grown up surrounded by all things military. I understand the honor of serving and the commitment a soldier makes to his/her country. Yet, I have to wonder if these young people fully appreciate the grave sacrifice that going to war may imply. You don't get three lives before it's "game over." It's not a game.

In an ironic twist to the story, another recent news article goes on to report that military recruiters have been forced to dismiss large numbers of potential recruits due to rampant obesity. In fact, the problem is so chronic, they're considering starting a "fat farm" to transform chubbies into lean, mean, fighting machines.

Hmm... you know, maybe all that time spent on the couch playing video games has its drawbacks.

— Gee Vee

If we can put a man on the Moon...

A lot of attention has been given to Barack Obama's Blackberry addiction. He's apparently been given permission to continue to use it— for now.

I can see both sides of this issue. I've been using a smartphone for about a year, and I'm absolutely in love with it! This goes wayyyyyy beyond having a phone at hand wherever you may be; this means having the WORLD at hand. While I can't do some of the work that I can from my pc, I can make it work for quite a bit in a pinch. Another big plus, I can connect my smartphone to my laptop and connect to the Internet wherever I can get a cell phone signal. I can park my car in the middle of Dingman's Marsh and shop for shoes @ Amazon!

Here in Northern Michigan, where technology makes notoriously slow advances, it's like a little miracle. When you consider the fact that we couldn't even get a private phone line (only party lines available) in our house a little over twenty years ago, you begin to appreciate how far we've come. Umm... if you're too young to know what a "party line" is, go ask your grandma. In fact, I believe St. Ignace, just across the bridge, was the last town in the U.S. to still connect all calls using a live switchboard operator.

"Hello, Mabel? Could you connect me to Dr. Smith's office? Uh, no, my bunion is fine, thank you. Could you just put me through?"

Yeah, that would be a pain. I think they finally updated their system about 30-35 years ago.

Anyway, one thing I've avoided with my smartphone is posting a blog entry, but maybe I'll give it a try sometime soon. I'm just not that fond of texting, although I've become considerably faster with practice. I think it's my almost-anal attention to punctuation that complicates the process... well, that and the fact that I still prefer to write "you" rather than "u." Just call me old school, I guess.

I really appreciate the president's reluctance to give up his smartphone. It would be like taking a huge leap backwards, having to rely on dictated messages sent via snail-mail or waiting to make a phone call over a secure land line. On the other hand, security must be paramount. Also, there's a law that makes all his correspondence public domain, including email and text messages.

A compromise may be coming in the form of a smartphone produced by General Dynamics that offers unprecedented security. Of course, it comes with a hefty price tag, running about $2,650 to $3,350 per unit, but The Edge would allow him to toggle between integrated classified and unclassified PDA with a keystroke.

You know, on so many levels, I wouldn't want that man's job. Of course, sitting at that beautiful desk in the Oval Office is a pretty neat perk...

Naaaa! I want my smartphone.

— Gee Vee

Conundrum

One of the features I most enjoy about my blog is the little "word of the day" gadget offered by Merriam-Webster. Just when I think I know words, they toss something new my way. Today's word is a perfect example: espiègle, an adjective which means "frolicsome" or "roguish." However, I know if I try to casually use that word in a sentence, I'll get some funny looks. The solution? I have a friend at work who loves new words too. Every time we find one, we quiz the other's word power. This is a good way to lock the word and its definition away in my pointed little head; I have to retain it long enough to try out on Dennis the next time I see him.

There's something weird I've noticed about new words. So often I stumble across a word I've never heard then suddenly I seem to encounter it everywhere! Does that happen to you? For instance, I can practically guarantee I'm going to hear the bag boy at Glen's use espiègle in a sentence later this week. Honestly, it's kinda freakish how often that happens.

So does that mean the bag boy has been reading Merriam-Webster's Word of the Day and couldn't wait to use it in a sentence, or has the word been popping up in ordinary conversation all along, and I've simply been oblivious? Hmm... or wait, I wonder, does that account for the funny looks I'll get if I try to use the word in a sentence today— everyone else just heard it for the first time this week, and now they're kinda freaked out because they're suddenly hearing it everywhere?

And what about other words, words you know but rarely hear in ordinary conversation that suddenly crop up over and over. For instance, I must have heard "plethora" five time this week. Was it on dictionary.com's "word of the day" list recently, and everyone's decided to take it for a test drive?

In Buddhist thought, this may be an example one of life's little mysteries they refer to— "that which is not knowable." However, if all truths are knowable, then just knowing I've encountered an unknowable truth makes it knowable... and I guess I've just stumbled on Fitch's Paradox.

But, anyway, that's a topic for another day. I've got all I can manage right now just trying to memorize my bright, shiny new word... espiègle...espiègle... espiègle...

TTYL...espiègle...espiègle...

— Gee Vee

This Really Gets My Goat!

Well, Jamie's been neglecting us while she's been out of town, so I thought I'd post this cute little CapeCast News Video on her behalf. Enjoy!

— Gee Vee

Day 1

What a day!

I'd hoped to be home from work in time to watch the swearing-in ceremony, but that plan kinda fell apart. I ended up watching it from a TV at work. In fact, they couldn't pry me away until after the president had finished his inaugural address.

Home at last, I've been glued to the coverage. We did make a couple phone calls this afternoon.

One call was to our good friends wintering on Saint Simons Island, Georgia. As much as I've looked forward to this day, Dwight and Roberta are happy beyond my ability to convey in words. Roberta's brother was a Tuskegee Airman. In fact, for Christmas they sent us a copy of the book written about his service as a black pilot during WWII. Her brother, now frail with age, was invited to participate with his squadron in today's parade in Washington; unfortunately he's not able to tolerate the cold and couldn't risk the trip. We called because we wanted to share their pride and hear the tears joy in their voices. My God, the tears of joy!

Our second call was to friends who were invited to the inauguration in Washington, guests of Indiana Senator, Evan Bayh. I called while I was watching the parade this afternoon, imagining they must be somewhere (with a great view!) along the parade route. Not so. They were back at their hotel, collapsed in exhaustion and watching the parade on TV. Apparently, the security and the crowds at the capital building this morning were almost overwhelming. However, they did have a great vantage point from their seats and promised to send along some pictures when they get home. What wonderful memories they've made today!

But tonight my thoughts aren't with friends in Georgia or Washington, they're with all those people who felt just a little disconnected today. They're with my mother and my brother; they're with each person who isn't quite sure this president is really their president. For those souls burdened with uncertainty, resentment and regret, I've one wish and one hope.

I wish that four years from now they'll be able to look back and realize that today was for them most of all.

And I hope with all my heart they won't be disappointed.

— Gee Vee

Exhausted Blogger Briefing

Since I was particularly long-winded yesterday, couldn't sleep last night and after work spent six hours in the emergency room with Mom this afternoon, I'm going to give you (and me!) the day off.

Woooowoooooo! Enjoy!

Oh, BTW, Mom is fine. She has the intestinal flu and needed a liter of fluids and a dose of Morphine to calm her bowels. She's lost 15 pounds in the past 48 hours. There's sure some nasty crud going around.

Yikes! I hope she hasn't shared it with me. :\

TTYL!

— Gee Vee

Our Manifest Destiny?

As Barack Obama prepares to make some tough budget choices in the near future, I'm sure NASA is squirming a bit in the hot seat. Plans to put men/women on the Moon, and eventually Mars, may be seriously delayed as funding for non-essential programs is channeled into this country's more immediate concerns. But if these plans eventually do come to fruition, we may see a small colony of humans established on Mars— possibly within my lifetime. I'd love to live long enough to be a part of that moment.

While many debate and speculate whether our planet has already been visited by aliens from other worlds, the scientific community remains skeptical. For instance, the mission of the SETI (Search for Extra-Terrestrial Intelligence) Institute is "to explore, understand and explain the origin, nature and prevalence of life in the universe." Their scientists continue to invest many man-hours and $$$ in their search to find ET. Their largest single investment to date is in the Allen Telescope Array. The Allen Array is a collection of many small radio telescopes that are synchronized in such a way that they function just as effectively as one large telescope (such as the Arecibo Radio Telescope in Puerto Rico). Now, they'll no longer have to compete for valuable telescope time elsewhere and can "listen" for that illusive communication signal from beyond our solar system 24/7. Anyway, my point is, if the scientists at SETI and around the world honestly believed that ET was already right here, would they bother to spend so much money to find him elsewhere? Not likely.

What if we never find ET? What if, in the entire universe, the life found right here on Earth is unique. Now, we begin to see our little colony on Mars from a new perspective. Our colony may, in fact, be a seed. Our gift to the universe— LIFE.

Now, bear with me here. I'll get to point of this post eventually. I'm just trying to lay a little groundwork to help explain my thought processes.

So, anyway, we appreciate the fact that just getting to Mars is a massive undertaking. Frankly, NASA will never be able to take the sort of risks they got away with during the early Apollo missions. Those first astronauts on the moon traveled in craft held together with little more than a wish and prayer. The astronauts, themselves, were primarily selected from the test pilot pool of gutsy aviators. Since then, two major shuttle catastrophes have changed how the game is played. Now, everything is tested and re-tested... and then tested again.

Not only will it take time to develop and refine the technologies that will make the trip possible, even the people eventually selected to make the journey beyond our Earth/Moon system will be carefully screened and prepared. These candidates will be subjected to intense psychological testing... after all, we can't have a whacko getting claustrophobic half-way to Mars, possibly disrupting a mission we've invested billions of dollars and years in the planning and implementation process. They will also need to be in optimum physical condition, with the mental and emotional stamina and determination to maintain their peak performance over the course of several years. They will be highly-educated and the cream of the crop from their respective fields, whether they're engineers, geologists, botanists, chemists or the finest aviators.

Okay, take a leap with me, here. Let's leap, say, two thousand years into the future. Provided humankind on Earth continues to thrive, survive, we may find that the racial, societal, geo-political divisions on our little blue planet have blurred. Our human colonies have spent many generations evolving on Mars and, perhaps, beyond. There will certainly be human "Martians"— offspring who were born, raised, matured and who eventually died without ever having visited their ancestral home, Earth. In these colonies, they will have created indigenous, semi-autonomous, social and political structures of their own. They will have engineered facilities and resources that allows them to survive exclusive from Earth and her support systems.

Back on Earth, while I'm pretty sure we'll still have reasons to fight amongst ourselves, those reasons may seem pretty trivial in comparison to our conflicts today. After all, we're now all pretty much one shade of tan, and we're almost literally "kissing cousins," genetically speaking. Instead, we may look to the stars and resent all the money and effort expended over the millennia to support those fledgling colonies. We may have a new nemesis— the progeny of the "cream of the crop" we so carefully hand-picked to scatter our seed beyond our planet.

I think we've finally arrived at the point to all this rambling.

Will humanity, being the fickle creature it is, come to hate the offspring of its endeavors with the same intensity we reserve for other races, religions and ideologies today? Will a kernel of envy gnaw away at those left behind? Will the colonists, in turn, resent our interference in their ultimate destiny, much the same as the American colonists came to chafe under English mandates two centuries ago?

And finally, will we have ultimately, albeit inadvertently, managed to accomplish what Adolph Hitler, with all his horrific machinations, could only aspire to achieve: create an elite "master race," a population carefully hand-picked for its superior skill set, bravery, intellect and physical endurance?

Or will humanity evolve, perhaps at the DNA level, learn to live in peace and in the spirit of service for the sake of the greater good? Kinda like ants... or bees?

I have less faith in that last possibility.

....

Well, there you have it. That's what I spent my Sunday morning dwelling on. You know, I have a brand new Nora Roberts romance novel collecting dust on my end table. I think I seriously need the diversion right now, don't you?

TTFN

— Gee Vee

The Model Garage

We lost an old friend this week. At the visitation last night, we caught glimpses of his life captured in old photos and family memorabilia.

We best knew Jack as a mechanic and as Dan's father's buddy. He'd owned the Mobil Station in town for many years, a legacy handed down by his father before him. I guess you might say knowing cars was in his blood. When he decided to "retire" many years ago, he sold the station but didn't quit working for long. He started to repair cars out of a small steel building—little more than a large shed, really— on the outskirts of town. It has a rickety hoist, an old oil stove for heat and poor lighting, but he seemed happy working there a few hours a day.

Dan came home from a rummage sale many years ago with a small box filled with old Popular Science magazines. These magazines spanned the 1950s and '60s, and it was fun to look back at the simpler way of life you could visit between their pages. One regular monthly feature of the magazine was Gus Wilson's Model Garage.

Gus Wilson was the kind of mechanic you always wish you could find— honest as the day is long, hardworking, a true friend, someone who really had an instinct for cars. Every month Gus would solve a mystery surrounding a car or truck, and I loved his calm, plain-spoken temperament. He was an unlikely hero in greasy coveralls.

Jack was our "Gus." You could always trust Jack. He never gouged you on the price; in fact, you often wondered if he charged enough for his time. I mean, how often do you leave your mechanic feeling that way? Of course, there were quite a few things Jack couldn't repair from his small shop. He didn't have a fancy diagnostic computer, but for all the routine brake jobs, welding and whatnot, he was simply the best. With his passing, I feel like we've all just lost another "Gus," a dinosaur, a relic from the past some might say, but he was a part of the past that remembered a good mechanic should be a good neighbor and a friend first and foremost.

Today our community will gather to remember Jack, our neighbor and our friend. They will remember he loved to hunt and fish and play with his grandchildren. They'll remember he was a devoted husband, a selfless civic leader and active in his church.

And they'll remember he was a damned good mechanic.

— Gee Vee

I triple-dog dare ya!

HAMMOND, Ind. (AP) -- In a scene straight out of the movie "A Christmas Story," a 10-year-old boy got his tongue stuck to a metal light pole. Police said the unidentified fourth-grader was able to tell them that a friend dared him to lick the pole Wednesday night. Temperatures in Hammond were around 10 degrees at the time.

Yeah, been there, done that.

In other cold news: Jamie, Nick and Collin have traveled this week to Nick's family home in Iowa for a belated "Christmas" gathering, complete with a Christmas tree, gifts and everything! The temperature this morning in the Fort Dodge area is 22° below zero. (I hope Jamie knows better than to lick the light pole.)

Since we weren't able to share the holidays with Jamie and Nick, we gave them a web cam for Christmas. I confess, our motives may have been a little selfish. We promptly dubbed the device the "Collin Cam." It's so nice to sit and watch Jamie playing with the baby in the evenings. She sure has her hands full! It's almost as good as being there. Hmm... maybe better. I don't have to change diapers during intermission.

(Jes, pick up an inexpensive web cam, girl, and we can figure out how to make a three-way conference call!)

I think I bought my first web cam way back in 1998. The technology certainly has improved (so has my connection speed, up from the 26.4 kbps dial-up speed available at the time), although we're still having a little trouble with the audio. Jamie and I finally decided to use the speaker phone on our cell phones, instead. This set-up works pretty well, but I really need to fiddle with the camera/software settings to see how to correct the issue.

.....

Okay, okay! I know the web cam thingy isn't as good as actually sharing Christmas with the kids in Iowa right now, but we'll take what we can get, alright?!

— Gee Vee

"Worst Guest Ever?"

Hmmm... you don't say.

HELP WANTED

As published in The Telegraph:

• The position requires "minimum effort" and involves "relaxed" duties such as feeding turtles, watching whales, and picking up the island's post.
• Applicants require no academic qualifications, but must possess good swimming skills and a love of snorkeling, scuba diving and other water sports.
• A passion for the great outdoors and the ability to speak English was also said to be an advantage.
• Candidates will also have to demonstrate an "adventurous attitude" and a "willingness to try new things".
• The successful applicant will live rent-free in the lap of luxury on Hamilton Island, dubbed the 'jewel in the crown' of the Whitsunday Islands off the Queensland coast.
• They will receive a three-bedroom house with "unbeatable" views of a crystal-clear lagoon lined with palm trees and ringed by white sandy beaches.
• The six-month contract comes with a salary package of AUD 150,000 ($102,160.89 USD), including free return flights, transfers, expenses and transport around the island.
• It equates to £972 ($1,418.18 USD) per hour based on a 'flexi-time' schedule of a 12-hour working month.
• The offer might sound too good to be true, but the Queensland Tourist Board insists there is no catch.
• It says the role is an ideal opportunity for Brits to swap the 'rat race' and the cold winter for a more relaxed life Down Under.

Jonathan Sloan, who works on behalf of Tourism Queensland in the UK, said: "This is the best job in the world, there's no question about it. "It has everything most people dream of - white sandy beaches, blue skies, warm seas and friendly people. "It also boasts a very generous salary package and requires only a few hours of relaxed work with minimum effort per week." Advertised as a "once-in-a-lifetime opportunity", the role of "Island Caretaker" is now being advertised in 18 countries across the world. Beginning on July 1, the successful applicant will have few responsibilities and can decide how best to fill their days. But they will be required to produce a weekly online blog, photo diary and video updates of their time on the island. They will also have to give regular media interviews and send reports via email to chiefs at Tourism Queensland at the organisation's headquarters in Brisbane. Requirements for candidates include: "Excellent communication skills, good written and verbal English skills, an adventurous attitude, willingness to try new things, a passion for the outdoors, and good swimming skills and enthusiasm for snorkeling and/or diving." Anthony Hayes, the chief executive of Tourism Queensland, said the offer was being made to promote the island to a "global market". He said: "The cooperative marketing campaign aims to highlight the Islands of the Great Barrier Reef and showcase Australia's own unique Island experience, to the global market." Interested parties can apply by submitting a 60-second video outlining the reasons they deserve to be picked. Applications are now open and close on February 22. Tourism Queensland will select 11 potential candidates who will be whisked away to Hamilton Island for a selection process. The lucky applicant will be named on May 6

BTW, don't bother to apply. I'm definitely the gal for this job!

— Gee Vee

MIRAGE

Whenever I close my eyes and allow my mind to wander... regress, I can almost smell its arid breath and even the grease on fatigues is more pungent. I can feel the extraordinary heat of the Mojave at midday until it begins to burn, blister. If I listen closely, I can hear the roar of the massive rocket engines being tested beyond the vast expanse of the dry lake bed, the startling retort of a sonic boom. The metal venetian blinds resonate and windows shudder in protest. And always, always, there's the comforting hum of a swamp cooler you should never take for granted but do.

If I opened my eyes, I might see the mirage. A dry lake is fluid as it shimmers against the foothills. Green— a miracle, so unlikely against the indigenous, tawny palette. The utilitarian, simple geometric form of the pale stucco buildings reflect the blinding light... they're dazzling, like faceted gemstones carelessly scattered across the terracotta landscape. And the young test pilots are so beautiful, braver somehow. Like knights in a shining armor that glints like a beacon as it soars, its maiden's token, a billowing contrail streaming across an azure field of honor.

They say you can never go back. But I do.

Whenever I close my eyes and allow my mind to wander....

— Gee Vee

Reflections Of Another Era

With our renewed determination to dial-down the gas furnace this winter and, instead, rely heavily on the electric space heaters I mentioned in a previous post, Jamie and Nick's Christmas gift to "Mom, Dad, Maisey and the kitties" has been a huge hit.

The small electric throw blanket is so soft and warm, the entire household wants a piece of it. Since I plugged it in near my chair in the living room (You snooze, you lose, Dan!) I have become the kitties' new best friend, and Maisey can be found most mornings curled up beside me while I write to you. Sometimes I even have two kitties and the puppy tucked in around me, leaving barely enough laptop for my laptop— which makes it a bit awkward to type, believe me. The little blanket has become our family's beloved version of "gathering 'round the wood stove."

In other news: Dan and I have been busy trimming the fat and calories from our diets since the first of the year. It's not really part of a "resolution" in the traditional sense but rather the fact that with the holidays behind us, it's simply time to shed a few pounds before summer arrives. I really notice it first thing in the morning while the rest of the household is sleeping... [ahem!] half of it sleeping on the electric throw across my legs. Anyway, the house is so quiet you can hear a pin drop. Then suddenly my tummy growls— LOUDLY— like a low rumble of thunder that shudders through my entire body. The kitties stir from their catnaps to stare at me in accusation.

"For god's sake, woman, why don't you get something to eat so we can go back to sleep?" they seem to say.

You know, this whole situation just struck me as very funny. I mean, with the grim economic news I just read on CNBC, the group of us huddled in a throw blanket to keep the chill in the house at bay and the sound of my stomach growling its misery, I figure I could probably write a pretty convincing sequel to The Grapes of Wrath right about now.

.....

Nah! Too depressing. I think I'll just go turn up the furnace and have some yogurt, instead.

TTFN

Update: 2 PM, 13 Jan 2009

I just had a chance to go back and re-read this entry, and I'm ashamed of myself. In fact, my first impulse was to delete the entry altogther. However, I finally decided to leave it posted as a reminder and a reprimand to myself.

Too many people here in Northern Michigan are truly struggling to heat their homes and feed their families this winter for me to sound so glib. It's no joking matter, and I'm sorry that I seemed to treat such a serious issue with such insensitivity. When I sat down to write this morning, I didn't have a topic in mind and simply started typing about the blanket we received for Christmas with absolutely no idea where the story would take me.

I count my blessings every day that Dan and I have a roof over our head, plenty of propane in the tank and dinner on the table each night. My heart goes out to those families suffering REAL hardship during this trying time.

— Gee Vee

And For An Encore...

Okay, I've pretty much exhausted the topic of the moon at perigee and the moon illusion. So, what's next you ask? Well, I'll tell you:

THE GREEN FLASH!

What's the "Green Flash"?

It seems to be the holy grail of amateur atmospheric observations. From what I've read, most efforts to capture the phenomenon with a video camera fail miserably. It needs to be seen for yourself. I'll to try and explain how the green flash works, but you'd probably learn more from the Wikipedia definition.

In a nutshell, blue and green wavelengths in the visible light spectrum bend further than, say, red or orange. When you closely observe the setting sun on a very clear, calm day, you may be able to see a green flash of light rays (although some people report other colors, including violet) at the very last moment because they are able to bend around the curvature of the Earth. I hope you'll check out the link for more information. There are some fine pictures posted there.

I don't expect to search for the green flash until spring, but it's definitely on my to-do list this summer. Besides, it sounds like a great excuse to sit and watch the sunsets over Lake Michigan.

In the meantime, here is a link to one of the better videos I've been able to find:

Green Flash At Sunset Over Buzzards Bay, West Falmouth, MA

And who knows... perhaps you'll decide to try and capture the green flash for yourself. Take a camera, and let me know how you do. Happy hunting!

— Gee Vee

Saturday Night In Review

Dan and I went to dinner and a movie last night but did catch a glimpse of the "moon illusion" through a band of clouds. The clouds were definitely disappointing to see. The ride home later in the evening was pretty cool though. The moon was much higher in the sky by that time and so bright that you could literally see to drive without your headlights, if you were so inclined (and willing to risk a hefty fine).

I read this morning that you may be able to see a still-impressive view of the not-so-full moon tonight, complete with a second chance at the moon illusion, weather permitting. I'm not holding my breath. Our forecast calls for snow. I hope you have better luck.

The movie turned out to be good albeit very sad. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button was the sort of movie that left you feeling introspective and quiet as you found yourself thrust back into the reality beyond the theater doors. Unlike my mother, who loved it so much that she can't wait to buy the DVD when it's released, I'm not sure I'd want to see it again— too sad for my taste. I would much rather leave a theater feeling like I'd just spent a couple hours escaping to a happy place. Know what I mean?

I've today off and plan to spend it aging gracefully (and in the traditional direction) from the comfort of my home.

TTFN

— Gee Vee

Hmm... Must Be A Full Moon

BTW, it wasn't really a slip of the tongue when "I called you a "looneytoon" in my post from earlier this morning.

It was an obscure reference to the word "moon"— in its Latin origins, "Luna." Popular folklore has often attributed a heightened level of "lunacy" to the full moon, and even modern day rumors of full emergency rooms and crowded jail cells seem to substantiate the myth.




So, is this phenomenon for real... or are we all just lunatics?

(Heh! Sorry, couldn't resist!)

— Gee Vee

Perigee Is No Moon Illusion

If you happened to catch the amazing view of the full moon at perigee (in an elliptical orbit, its closest approach to Earth) last month, you're about see the sequel.

Saturday, 10 January, will feature the largest full moon of the year. I hope it's not cloudy— you won't want to miss it! Best viewing will be shortly after the moon rises when you'll be able to combine the reality that the moon actually is closer with the mystery of the "moon illusion."

The moon illusion is a phenomenon that scientists and psychologists still struggle to understand. Perhaps you've seen a SUPER-BIG MOON hanging low over the horizon, tried to take a picture and found the photo was a disappointment. In the photo the moon looked like your average, ordinary full moon. The moon illusion simply cannot be captured through an aperture. Yup, you looneytoon, it's really all in your head! Look back at the moon a bit later the same night, and the optical illusion will have disappeared.

But don't let the fact that it's not entirely what it seems to be diminish the experience. The full moon at perigee tonight should be breathtaking to see, even at midnight.

— Gee Vee

Metro D.C. Meltdown: Part II

As long as I'm busy today passing along updates relating to previous posts, here's a link a CNN article with more information on the upcoming inauguration in D.C. — Gee Vee

Inauguration May Be Traffic, Security Nightmare

USGS Podcast: Yellowstone Update

Here's a link to an informative USGS podcast update (released: 6 Jan 2009) which discusses the recent Yellowstone earthquake swarm. Following that, I've posted a copy of the most recent YVO Information Release. — Gee Vee

Is Something Brewing In Yellowstone?

========================================

Yellowstone Volcano Observatory Information Release (Posted: Tuesday, January 6, 2009 00:39 MST)

Yellowstone Lake Earthquake Swarm Summary as of 6 January 2009

Through 5 January 2009, seismic activity has markedly decreased. It is possible that the swarm has ended, though a return of activity may occur as Yellowstone swarms of the size usually last for tens of days to many weeks.

About 500 earthquakes occurred between Dec. 26 through Jan. 1. Three hundred of the earthquakes (including all >M2.0) have been reviewed by seismologists. There have been 86 earthquakes with M > 2.0 and 16 earthquakes > M3.0. About 200 smaller earthquakes have yet to be reviewed. Depths are difficult to determine accurately. The best located earthquakes have depths on the order of 3 to 10 km (1.8 to 6.0 miles). From Dec. 26 through Jan 2, the earthquake hypocenters appear to have migrated northwards, starting southeast of near Stevenson Island, with many of the latest events occurring near Fishing Bridge.

The recent swarm is well above typical activity at Yellowstone. Nevertheless it is not unprecedented during the last 40 years of monitoring. Swarms are the typical mode of occurrence of earthquakes within the Yellowstone caldera, with magnitudes ranging to > 4.0. The 1985 swarm on the northwest rim of the caldera lasted for three months, with earthquakes up to M4.9 and over 3000 total events recorded.

Magnitudes of earthquakes in this swarm range from zero to 3.9. Seismologists categorize those of magnitude less than 3.5 as generally not felt by persons. For perspective, earthquakes of magnitude 3.4 to 4.5 are often felt, as several of the events in this swarm have. A magnitude 5 or greater is generally required to produce damage to buildings or other structures.

Improved volcano and seismic monitoring at Yellowstone gives us a greater ability to locate earthquakes, understand their source process and identify anomalous sources of seismic activity. New equipment including precise measurements of ground motion by GPS receivers and borehole strainmeters provided by the National Science Foundation's EarthScope and Continental Dynamics Program have been used extensively during the last week of intense earthquake activity. Ground motions accompanying the swarm, from the GPS instruments will take two or more weeks to fully process. It is worth noting that in 2004 the Yellowstone caldera began a period of accelerated uplift measured by GPS instruments that was as large as 7 cm/yr (2.7 inches/yr), three times as fast as recorded in the recorded history but has now reduced to about a maximum rate of 4 cm/yr. Scientists have modeled this deformation as due to magmatic recharge of the Yellowstone magma chamber at a depth of ~10 km (6 miles). The area of the swarm is on the eastern side of the uplift area.

Earthquakes at Yellowstone are caused by a combination of geological factors including: 1) regional stress associated with normal faults (those where the valleys go down relative to the mountains) such as the nearby Teton and Hebgen Lake faults, 2) magmatic movements at depth (>7 kms or 4 miles), and 3) hydrothermal fluid activity caused as the groundwater system is heated to boiling by magmatic heat.

At this time, no one has noted any anomalous changes in surface discharges (hot springs, gas output, etc.).

YVO staff from the USGS, University of Utah and Yellowstone National Park continue to carefully review all data streams that are recorded in real-time. At this time, there is no reason to believe that magma has risen to a shallow level within the crust or that a volcanic eruption is likely. The USGS Volcano alert level for Yellowstone Volcano remains at Normal/Green.

Yellowstone National Park is evaluating infrastructure near the north end of Yellowstone Lake to assess if any damage has occurred to facilities.

Winter visitor activities and staff operations have not been impacted and continue as normal.

=================================

No Sale!

While we were talking to Jamie on the phone yesterday, the topic of Ann Coulter came up. I'd been regretting my impulse to post the NBC news clip here on my blog. I also regretted voicing my opinion of her in no uncertain terms (even though I didn't resort to profanity, as tempting as that inclination may have been). Like I explained to Jamie, it's not really that I object so much to what she says (even when her statements are clearly intended to shock and inflame people) but rather it's how she says the things she does. There's just so much... aggression simmering just under surface, perhaps even hatred. She's like some feral creature just waiting to pounce.

At this point in our conversation, I think Dan and I may have spent an amusing minute or two speculating about the fate of some poor guy destined to share a bed with that woman. Dan figured a cat o' nine tails would definitely be involved and that it would probably prove to be very painful. I think the gentleman would need to closely guard all those bits and pieces near and dear to him; her tongue is sharp enough to emasculate a poor performance.

Umm...BTW, have you ever heard Jamie react to a topic that makes her uncomfortable? Well, anyway, this was evidently more information than she wanted to hear, so we quickly changed the subject.

However, it's still been on my mind, and since yesterday's newscast I've wondered why I'm so bothered by Ms. Coultler's aggression. I particularly worried that I objected because she's a woman. I mean, maybe on some unconscious level I expect women to be warm and fuzzy, and a woman who clearly has testosterone issues kinda freaks me out. Could I possibly be that biased against strong women? I am a woman for god's sake— a woman with some fairly strong opinions of my own.

Well, after quite of bit of introspection, I finally hit pay dirt.

I am NOT bothered by her tone and demeanor because she's a woman. In fact, I don't think that's even a factor. Yesterday I recalled that I felt the same way watching Bill O'Reilly's interview with Barack Obama prior to the election. In that interview O'Reilly was just as aggressive— combative to the point of being downright rude. It was like he was deliberately trying to provoke Obama in order to make his interview more interesting, more controversial. Bottom line: It appeared to me that as far as he was concerned, it was all about his ratings. After all, a rational dialog between two opposing viewpoints just doesn't agitate the masses. Even a negative reaction is still a reaction. You've made an impact. You've got people talking. YOU'VE GOT PEOPLE POSTING YOUR INTERVIEW ON THEIR BLOGS!

Arghhh! I am such an idiot. [sigh]

Anyway, now I understand that Ms. Coulter is deliberately provocative because she wants to sell her books; however, I don't agree that the end justifies the means. Sorry. I'm just not buying it— her stratagem or her book.

— Gee Vee

I'll Bite My Tongue

I just watched an interview with Ann Coulter, "the Queen of Conservatism," on the Today Show. I'm sorry. Like Dan said, it's kinda like watching a train wreck— absolutely horrific, but you can't seem to help yourself.

But, hey, don't take my word for it.

Now, aren't you proud of me for not having something a bit more... [ahem!] caustic to say? I mean, I even have an entire collection of perfectly suitable 4-letter words that I could have used to describe that odious woman! I deserve a gold star for showing restraint, right?

— Gee Vee

Guess Who's Hiring!

It's "off-season" here at the tip of the mitt and throughout the Upper Peninsula. After color tour in the fall, the majority of gift shops, fudge shops, motels and restaurants close for the winter. For a substantial number of local people, signing up for unemployment is an annual event. This year is no exception.

What has been noteworthy this winter is the staggering numbers of unemployed from outside the tourist industry, from all sectors of the labor market and from all corners of the state. Michigan's unemployment currently stands at 9.6%— that's one in ten people— the highest in the country.

Several of my friends have signed up for new claims in recent days. Correction: They have attempted to sign up in recent days. Their phone calls are greeted by repeated busy signals, and the web site has been rejecting their pin and social security numbers. They can't log on. Because the problem is so systemic, we have a phone number for the unemployment agency posted on the bulletin board at work that you can call and talk to a real (!) person. There's also a phone number for our state representative's office in Lansing with a notation that says his office will help you straighten out your filing issues in a matter of hours. Although these tactics seemed to work for some people back in October and November, they're now met with more busy signals and dead-ends.

The problem gets worse. Once you do manage to open a new claim, you need to call on a specific day once every two weeks, during a specific one-hour window of opportunity to report any earnings, etc. in order to collect your check. Problem is, the phone lines are jammed during your call-in hour. Can you imagine how frustrating it must be to hit the redial button over and over for a entire hour, only to watch your one chance to receive your unemployment on schedule slipping away? No, it doesn't matter that it wasn't your fault. Your only recourse is to call back on the following Thursday and try again. Meanwhile, you may fall behind on your bills and can't afford gas for your car.

Now, I understand people are having trouble reporting on Thursday, the second chance-day. More busy signals.

Today I read, with some dismay, an AP Press report on the unemployment system's glitches— not only here in Michigan but across the nation. They are simply overwhelmed. And as more of my friends file their jobless claims and the states scramble to hire additional staff, I have to wonder if the only truly secure jobs left are with the Unemployment Insurance Agency.

— Gee Vee

Carpe Noctem!

I joined a local astronomy society today. Well, I say "local," but the group actually meets about an hour's drive from my house. The society's administrator sent an email this evening to let me know they're not very active this time of year— not surprising; it's brrrrrr out there! However, this summer they do plan to gather for a few star parties.

Hmm... I wonder if there's alcohol involved? Can't hurt, right? ;)

Anyway, I may consider investing in a telescope later this spring. In the meantime, I've been reading the sweet little astronomy book Jamie gave me for Christmas (Does she know me, or what?) and also listening to Alex Filippenko's podcast astronomy lectures (Feed) while I'm at work.

I know; I'm such a dork. What can I say? I'm easily entertained. Hey, I actually cracked up when he blew up a pickle during his lecture because....

Eh, nevermind. You had to be there, I guess.

Did I happen to mention I'm a dork?

— Gee Vee

Has "Up North" Gone South for the Winter?

Today marks the unofficial end of the holiday season. Most people are heading back to work this morning and trying to pick up their normal routine. I have a chance to reflect on how business fared for those of us who work "up north" and depend on visitors to the area.

I don't have any hard and fast statistics to back up my claims; however, I do have over thirty years of experience observing the annual ebb and flow of tourism in Northern Michigan, and I did not see a mass exodus of snowmobilers crossing the bridge as in years past. In fact, I didn't see a tiny fraction of our normal bridge traffic. The restaurant wasn't surrounded by 4x4s pulling trailers; the back parking lot sat vacant for the most part. There's no shortage of snow this year to account for this. Most of our business seems to have been families traveling by passenger vehicles, but they definitely had fewer sleds in tow.

Conversely, I have heard from several reliable sources that area ski resorts were cram-packed. Dan and I had a chance to drive south to Indian River for dinner on Saturday and found their local restaurants surprisingly busy. Vivio's even appeared to have a waiting line. I'm not sure what conclusions may be drawn from these observations.

Because there's a good snowpack further south, snowmobilers didn't bother to drive so far north?

People opted to leave the expensive equipment home and go skiing instead?

Skiers are "economizing" by hitting their local slopes in Michigan, rather than travel out west to Vail?

The ski crowd and the snowmobile crowd traditionally represent different sectors of the labor market and are impacted by the sluggish economy in varying degrees of disparity?

Vivio's just has really good food?

All of the above?

None of the above?

I hope our friends and neighbors in the U.P. are hanging in there, and in hindsight I kinda wish we'd gone to St. Ignace (... or Vivio's!) for dinner, instead.

— Gee Vee

My Lazy Sunday Morning Continues...

We just caught this story by Steve Hartman on CBS Sunday Morning and thought you might enjoy it. You'll probably need to sit through a short commercial first, but I think it's worth the wait.

— Gee Vee

Just Wish Upon a Star

I had an unexpected opportunity to glimpse two "shooting stars", part of the Quadrantid Meteor Shower, while driving to work yesterday morning. I'd completely forgotten about the event until they crossed my path. Unfortunately, I was running late and didn't have time to watch for more. The sun was coming up by that time, so viewing would have probably been diminished anyway. Last night didn't improve my chances to see the Quads since heavy cloud cover had moved in.

Venus has been strikingly beautiful to see this week. Just after sunset a few nights ago it was positioned close to a pretty crescent moon and so bright it was truly dazzling. I hope you had a chance to see it.

If you're like me and really need to get a life, here's a handy-dandy 2009 calendar of celestial events you won't want to miss.

Right now Maisy is shoving her head across my keyboard, messing with my typing, so I'll take a hint and go start some breakfast. TTFN!

— Gee Vee

Connected

Since I'm actually old enough to remember life before the Internet became a household staple, it's pretty easy to recognize all the ways it has changed our lives. While it's power and potential may be abused, I'm pretty sure future generations will look back and agree that it has done more to advance civilization in a relatively short time-span than almost any other single innovation of the twentieth century. It's definitely right up there with the modern assembly line, airplanes, the silicone microchip and television. Today it has become so completely integrated into our lives, we tend to take its efficacy for granted.

A key component to its success must certainly be how interactive it can be. Unlike television where we simply sit and absorb a predetermined programming, the Internet allows us to talk back, to reach out, to connect in surprising ways. A personal space you share with a close circle of family and friends may suddenly find itself under the intense scrutiny of a faceless, anonymous public, every word dissected, dissembled, judged. You may be exposed to criticism and censure and forcibly reminded that the Internet is, first and foremost, a community forum.

And that's okay. We need that admonishment from time to time. That's what makes this such an amazing instrument to shape, form and finish opinions while learning to appreciate other viewpoints in the process.

— Gee Vee

Is "No News" Really "Good News"?

Since I wrote about the Yellowstone earthquake swarm on Tuesday (with an update on Wednesday morning), there has a remarkable lack of new information. This is remarkable due to the fact that most of the major news agencies have largely ignored the event even though it is clearly noteworthy.

What I have been able to learn:

• The earthquake swarm continues to center itself over Yellowstone's massive magma chamber and under Yellowstone Lake.*
• The swarm is located directly under a large "bulge" in the lake bottom that scientists have been watching for some time.*
• The Webicorder displays may be revealing "harmonic tremors" which apparently indicate magma may be on the move.*
• To the best of my knowledge, there has been no further comment from the USGS, the National Park Service or the Yellowstone Seismic Network since the harmonic tremors began.*

(* indicates the status at the time I prepare to post this entry)

I am also astonished by the number of people I've talked to over the past few days who know little-to-nothing about the Yellowstone Volcano or its potential. I've never been much of an alarmist. I did not run out to buy cases of toilet paper and canned goods when the Y2K event was forecast. But I do sit up and take notice when a geophysical anomaly is obviously occurring above such a massive magma pool.

I am also astonished (but not surprised) by how many people just look at me like I'm a serious wack-job for being concerned... after all, geologic and seismic activity happens at Yellowstone every day, and if they haven't heard about this on the evening news, I must be over-reacting.

Well, just FYI, I still haven't run out to buy an extra case of toilet paper.

But the very fact that I'm tempted to scares the bejabbers outta me.

— Gee Vee